Libertarian Superheroes
I was playing that game the other day… “If you had just one superpower, what would it be?”.
Hmmm…
What are the options?
- Invisibility. - It’s great for escaping goblins, conducting practical jokes and ermm… crime? voyeurism? and err… not much else. OK. Next!…
- Climbing things and shooting goo from your hands. As a little boy said to me the other day “Spiderman is SO GAY!”. Now, I’m not sure I approve of the homophobic manner in which he said it but I agree with the sentiment.
- Being absolutely loaded and buying loads of gadgets so you can swan about dishing out your own version of justice like Batman or ‘V’. Is that a super power? We’ll leave it in.
- Flying. Hmm yeaa… super fast could be good. What are you supposed to do with it? Can you fly with really heavy things? That could be useful. OK. That’s the best so far.
- Indestructibility - Who wants to live forever.
- Mind control - tempting! very tempting! too tempting. No.
- Telepor…..
…TATION!! Teleportation!! yes that’s the one! You’re the boy! I want it.
As SuperMonk™, my particular gift allows me to touch any object and it will teleport with me. That way, my girlfriend and I could be sipping a Pina Colada in the Carribean every day after… work.
Work. Work? Oh yea! I’d have to use this power in some way. What would be the point of being blessed with this gift if I didn’t use it? Well for one thing, I could help my girlfriend avoid that miserable commute every day. Even better, I could just touch the train and everybody on the train would be instantly teleported into London. Even better than that! - I could start up a business where I just went around touching teleportation buildings that moved people in and out of the suburbs saving them huge amounts of time and discomfort. I could do this in every city in the UK! The world! My girlfriend wouldn’t even have to work. I could charge people a very small amount for this as it’s not really any bother for me.
I should be moving shipping containers about too. I should be moving huge volumes of supplies from China to the USA. I should teleport the sick to the best medical facilities in the world. I should bring the hospitals to the sick and needy at a ridiculously low price. I could teleport huge volumes of water to the reservoir side of a dam so that we have a constant clean and cheap supply of energy. I should be making transportation, energy, healthcare and industry in general - as cheap as possible. Woh! STOP.
Hang on.
How did SuperMonk™ end up being an energy provider and distribution mogul? I thought superheroes were supposed to do cool things like fight crime and stopping old ladies from being mugged. Here I am moving containers of dildos from Taiwan to Crawley at the speed of light. Wouldn’t I be better off doing stuff like Superman does? Come to think of it - Why does Superman do that stuff? Why does he get to wear the cool red cape?! and look chiseled! and get all the praise! I’m busting a gut over here. He get’s the big mayoral NY procession. Everyone wants to get in his tight little red pants even though you can clearly see that he’s certainly not ’super’ in that department. I want my praise! I know I haven’t stopped a school bus full of children falling of a bridge but I have single handedly, albeit indirectly and without their knowledge, helped millions of people out of poverty and introduced 2 billion people to the joys of low cost sex toys. I have put a smile on the world’s face! They just don’t know it.
The more I think about it, the less I like that Superman. He’s a populist, vain, creep who squanders his talents.
Rather than pissing about with token gestures of good will, why doesn’t he do us all a favour and put some of that ceaseless power and muscle to good use and reduce the price of energy. Fuck him.
That’s the problem with selling libertarianism - No superheroes. No big displays of altruism. Just people using their talents to the best of their ability - hopefully in the knowledge that by serving the market they might just maximise those skills for the benefit of all.
Note - I had fun researching pictures for this.
Spiderman maximising his potential.
[...] Rather good actually. [...]
The Libertarian says if there is a public need then people or organisations will emerge to serve that need. In contrast, the statist tells people what the need is and promises to supply it.
The Libertarian politician thus essentially tells prospective voter if elected they will do nothing.
This is clearly an unattractive prospect and until Libertarians package that idea up better they will struggle.
In the UK the Conservatives are offering the electors a say in running their local schools. This is inspired by the Swedish model of education vouchers having made some improvement. Now of course, the media has no difficulty in finding electors who claim to be too busy to “run their local services” - “I pay officials to run the system for me”. That those officials run the schools badly and that there is Hobson’s Choice is ignored.
Hi TDK,
IMO, governments doing nothing is very much underrated. Unfortunately, any minarchist or libertarian government would be VERY busy. It would have its work cut out repealing law and assisting the transition to a society where its citizens do not constantly look to the state for answers. Government as the solution to all problems has become so endemic in British society that I actually wonder if it’s possible anymore.
It may not be an attractive package but that’s not to say that it isn’t a good method of government. Trying to pass your ideology off as something else would seem disingenuous.
The leaders of the three main parties consistently pander to the popular vote and this slowly erodes our faith in their convictions. I’d prefer it if our politicians had the courage to stick to what they truly believe; however unpopular this may be. Perhaps at the next party leader debate we’ll see one of them discuss the huge contribution that immigrants make to the UK economy or perhaps Nick Clegg might moot the idea that the NHS - whilst having many talented, hardworking and caring staff - potentially isn’t the best method to take care of the nations health needs. No chance.
On the flip-side you have the smaller parties: As a recent LPUK member, I was strangely happy to see the leader, Chris Mounsey, scalped by Andrew Neil on the politics show. I really didn’t care too much that he fluffed his answers or was forced into an apology for his foul mouthed blog. It was refreshing to see an unpolished politician. He has an ideology. He focuses on the ideas rather than the issues. Even stranger - I admire a similar trait in John Prescott.
RE: The Conservative education policy. Excellent stuff and a step in the right direction. I think Michael Gove is a superb politician. Perhaps some of these KIPP style schools may wish to employ a highly educated, cheap, Polish graduate though? Conservative immigration policy stinks.